Creating Time For Each Other ( Part One)
"We never have time for ourselves anymore" was one frustrating remark a father of two spur out while I was counselling him and hIs wife on a beautiful Saturday morning with a book titled 'The five languages f love', o hs hand. The frustration Mr Richard expressed is valid and ongoing. Late night, early morning, mid-dayno matter the timing, today's couples are constantly faced with obstacles. When it comes to intimacy and communication.
Although as a couple, lack of intimacy is a season that will eventually pass, but the realization of is is not the same between husbands and wives. while husbands easily embrace this fact as part of the family growth, wives who are wired completely. differently. It is just like a wife saying to her husband, " I know you are hungry, honey, but hang in there, a couple more years, and you will be able to eat whatever you want." Funny but that is how it appears with the emotional needs and 'supplies' in most married partners union.
Before married couples start a family, they have the whole time for themselves, but after the arrival of children, Combined with the normal workload; it becomes A new ball game. the arrival of small children can have a negative effect on the couple's intimacy. Teenagers can be just as detrimental. Although infants and toddlers demand the lion's share of couples time and attention, couples are often left drained of energy and sleep-peprived. They might not be in the mood for conversation, sex, and intimacy. Older kids bring their own set of intimacy disturbance in a different way. So how do we make intimacy a priority when time is not duty appropriated for it?
My quick response is for couples to realize that struggling to find time for intimacy is normal part of marriage. Although opportunities for intimacy arise when souse least expect them, spouse need to take a close look at their schedules and deliberately set out time for intimacy.
There is a need to plan ahead, while spontaneous opportunities for intimacy and lovemaking are great, they are also not enough. These opportunities will not always be available and are not enough to satisfy a healthy intimacy. Planning should be paramount when it comes to marital intimacy. Certain things in the lives of a couple can be negotiable such as where they are going to live, number of kods they want to raise and so on. A couple's intimacy and communication cannot be negotiated, even though this is often missing from the 'to do' list of an average couple. We all know that is the area where the greatest connection is established.
By: Rev Funmi Akingbade
Although as a couple, lack of intimacy is a season that will eventually pass, but the realization of is is not the same between husbands and wives. while husbands easily embrace this fact as part of the family growth, wives who are wired completely. differently. It is just like a wife saying to her husband, " I know you are hungry, honey, but hang in there, a couple more years, and you will be able to eat whatever you want." Funny but that is how it appears with the emotional needs and 'supplies' in most married partners union.
Before married couples start a family, they have the whole time for themselves, but after the arrival of children, Combined with the normal workload; it becomes A new ball game. the arrival of small children can have a negative effect on the couple's intimacy. Teenagers can be just as detrimental. Although infants and toddlers demand the lion's share of couples time and attention, couples are often left drained of energy and sleep-peprived. They might not be in the mood for conversation, sex, and intimacy. Older kids bring their own set of intimacy disturbance in a different way. So how do we make intimacy a priority when time is not duty appropriated for it?
My quick response is for couples to realize that struggling to find time for intimacy is normal part of marriage. Although opportunities for intimacy arise when souse least expect them, spouse need to take a close look at their schedules and deliberately set out time for intimacy.
There is a need to plan ahead, while spontaneous opportunities for intimacy and lovemaking are great, they are also not enough. These opportunities will not always be available and are not enough to satisfy a healthy intimacy. Planning should be paramount when it comes to marital intimacy. Certain things in the lives of a couple can be negotiable such as where they are going to live, number of kods they want to raise and so on. A couple's intimacy and communication cannot be negotiated, even though this is often missing from the 'to do' list of an average couple. We all know that is the area where the greatest connection is established.
By: Rev Funmi Akingbade
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